There are things going on that I can't write about...at least, not yet. I am sworn to secrecy. Lives would be ruined, empires would fall…you get the idea.
Kind of makes you wonder why you even experience anything…if you can’t tell or warn others about it.
Maybe the reason I can’t write about it yet—in addition to the whole secrecy thing—is that it’s not done evolving yet. The story is slowly and gradually winding itself to completion as I write. And I can’t imagine a very friendly ending.
I've spent some time here, where we all live...and I often wonder why people do what they do. What were you thinking? I can't tell you how many times I've said those words to someone. My guess is, they just don't know.
Well there’s an old proverb…you get what you give.
Let's turn to this side of the street...here’s something else that’s going on….
I’ve met someone whom I think I might get along with pretty well. Unfortunately she travels…a lot.
Like, every month.
She is home about two days a month, each month.
Ahhhh, but there’s always something isn’t there?
There’s always some catch…some small, tiny but still undesirable quality, feature or condition that brings it down to Earth…makes it less than the wonder and amazement that you think it could be.
See, with you and me…one catch was your complete confusion over relationships…over how I should be, over how YOU should be. We should’ve just BEEN…and that should’ve been enough. Hell, that’s enough for most people. But not us…we want more…sometimes, more than there is. More than this. And, it always seemed to be less than enough for the two of us.
Yes, I can handle the travel. I’m a great torch-bearer, I am. I don’t know if I could have a "normal" relationship, one without some kind of strings attached. There has to be something a little wrong with it…some reason so I can say, "well, it’s what I deserve. I shouldn’t have any more than this. I suppose I’ve done some bad things in this life, and I guess I should just be thankful for what I have." And I light a torch and champion this cause.
I hold my torch high, and with pride. And once it’s lit, I never let it go out.
I’m still trying to put out the torch I lit for you. Just when I think it’s finally dead and there are no embers left…I hear your voice…I remember the musky and exotic smell of your skin, the way your face lit up when you'd smile…and it burns strong and bright again.
And, as someone much more famous than me once said, "Please, don’t take away my pain…it’s all I have!"
Amen, Brother!
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